11.28.2007

Circle Round

"Surround yourself with people who respect and treat you well."
-Claudia Black
I have this quote attached to my refrigerator. I read it every day...and think on it...and am doing my best to bring the lesson of it into my life. I've been thinking about the people who allow me the space to be me...ALL of me. I tend to crave quite a bit of independence. I don't always feel comfortable with people being too close. After I expose myself a bit...I always feel a period of dis-ease. Should I have revealed myself that way? I like my space. That is why I sometimes find it quite humorous that I blog. I certainly don't lay it all on the line here...but there are occasions where I put my heart out...where I say things that I normally keep inside or where I just let go of thoughts and ideas and longings and beliefs that swirl around and take up room in my head and heart. Once I let go of them here...they are out there...but not in a way that usually leaves me uncomfortable. I might experience some vulnerability...but it doesn't last long...I can talk myself into just letting it be.
And when all of that is met with the kind of support...the kind of respect and goodness that comes from comments and e-mails and conversations in and about this space...that always takes me beyond the realm of just letting it be into the realm of really honoring and appreciating what this type of sharing can do for people.
That isn't to say it is to replace one-on-one interaction with the world. Although, it does open up avenues to communicate with people I may have never "met" in real life (yet anyway!)...it certainly also speaks to me of what I am wanting and loving about the relationships that exist in my physical sphere. There are several people in my life who allow me to be ME. They appreciate the journey...the searching...the experimentation...the honesty...the bare-bone craziness of life. There are people that I open myself up to in different ways...in ways that don't always feel "easy"...but where I am met with acceptance, with kindness, with empathy and understanding.
I'm really wanting to cultivate more of this in my heart...this being OPEN...this letting people in. Of course...I still want to protect myself in some ways. I know it is important to seek the kind of people who are open to my energy as well...because I DO know how it feels for an open heart to be dismissed...so this is where the learning takes place for me. In discernment of those who are open to me...and then, in turn, being more open to them. These beautiful souls who travel this earth and somehow, so perfectly, form tribes with me...through thought or form or heart or spirit...helping me breathe in the comfort of knowing that this is good. All is well in my world.
It is true...there are beautiful, affirming hearts forming circles around me at every moment.
"thank you" to my tribes.

5 comments:

cassie said...

love this picture, love this posting, love to hear you loving yourself, love you!

Alyson said...

Your energy and beauty is always welcomed by me :o) I am finding this new blogger world to be inspiring. Yours included! Thanks for all the links!

Debbie said...

Surrounding yourself with people who love and respect you for you is so hard to do. I think it takes great strength and respect for yourself to realize that the people you have in your life help you take each step forward. It took me many years to realize this. I am so glad you know you have a large circle surrounding you and supporting you and loving you. Love you girl!

bella said...

Did you get inside my head?
I'm right there with you.
I need my space, my solitude, time where I recollect myself. And yet I also yearn for true connection with others where I am seen and known in full and extend them same to them.
sometimes I don't know when I am pulling away because I need the space to ground or when it is out of fear of being exposed.
It is a dance, this moving between the desire to be opened to others and the pull towards privacy.
I'm learning I can be open with others, even offering what is personal, and that this is different then what is private, which I extend to a select few.
Still learning. And grateful to learn from you here.

daisies said...

these words that come from your heart could also come from mine, thank you for that ... xox