taking the plunge
is there anything greater in the universe than those moments that make you so confident in the process of life? Whether or not those moments are big or small...I live for them. It is such an incredible reassurance when you can look back at the past week, month, year, decade...and actually SEE the evolution of your life taking place. You can SEE the experiences that have brought you right smack dab in the moment you are existing in. I LOVE IT! It seems like it comes out of nowhere most of the time for me. Like tonight for example. About a month ago I received an e-mail from a dear girlfriend of mine telling me about these "transformational parenting circles" that she had just gotten some info about and thought she would share with me. When I read the e-mail, I remember feeling like sinking into the comfort of the possibilities I started dreaming up of this group. I mean, even the name sounds so MOTIVATING, doesn't it? So...I immediately contacted one of the women to let her know I was interested in attending. Tonight was the scheduled first meeting...and I went. Usually about the time 6pm rolls around...the only thing I am in the mood for is a low key evening at home with my little family. But...today was different. I was so IN the mood that even the thought of cuddling up with my loved ones and watching the wind through the trees couldn't keep me at home. I was really looking forward to discovering what this "circle" was all about. I didn't even really know what to expect...really I was just blindly attending ( i really liked the name). I wasn't going to know anyone there...but I didn't think twice about it. It felt kind of like how I used to feel in grade school when I would be going to a slumber party at a friend's house. Like I just KNEW that there was going to be some FUN for me there. Ends up...it was a bunch of wisdom, support, encouragement, faith, conversation, resources, and all around good LOVE that was there for me. You know...soul food. It was wonderful and I walked away feeling like I had made five new friends...that I had found a small community of people that will probably lead me to more communities of people...that I had gained a perspective that validates what I continuously feel in my soul about parenting...that I had been led there for specific reasons that I may not completely grasp at this moment. Moments like that are always so much bigger than I think they are anyway...why limit it by trying to think that I know what it was all about? After the two plus hours that I spent talking with these women....Journey and I raced to our car through the pouring rain and made our small trek home. It was in those 20 minutes that I felt the A-HA! I was thinking about the matters of my heart over the past couple of months. I was thinking on the recent goals I have set for myself. I was thinking about my own evolution over the past few years...and the ways in which I want to parent my children and the things that call to me and "feel right" in that realm. I was thinking....A LOT. And the rain....OH THE RAIN. How cleansing. It poured down on us...as if to say...this is a new beginning...here is some recycled water to wash away those old habits...let's grow some new life. Does this make sense to anyone out there? I am not getting very specific here, I know. Mostly just for the reason of keeping most of the experience personal. It all comes full circle when you can look back and see how you manifest things in your life and see how the small moments in life is what makes up...well....LIFE. Everything takes us to the present moment and everything is interconnected. If only we could maintain that clarity....if only I could hang onto that TRUST and KNOW that everything leads to something else and if we seek it out...there WILL be opportunities to develop more of ourselves...our spirits. Our soul will walk the path...all we have to do is take the plunge.