10.22.2008

what we know.

several weeks ago, i met up with a group of like minded mamas and there were speakers who shared with us the truth of this and that...the toxins in our environment and different ways in which we are exposing ourselves to harmful elements of our world. it was all very informative and enlightening and there were plausible steps offered that helped with the helpless feelings that come with knowing more than you want to know. but afterwards, i just wanted to run away into the forest with my children. and that isn't the first time that i have felt that way.
sometimes (ummm, mostly always) i want to recoil from the tv, and the video game culture that we are surrounded by. i want to sell all of our "things" and invest in a rigged up grease eating bus. i want to enjoy raw food and get off the grid. and for the most part, i know i have what it takes to do it...meaning i know that i wouldn't feel like i had to sacrifice much. instead, i think i would feel more alive and full and rich. because, to be honest, sometimes i just feel like i don't get it...this culture, this awkward play we keep inventing and taking part in. i want to live in a city where i don't *need* a car to get from here to there. i like buying my clothes second hand because they have stories. i enjoy words like used, thrifted, antique, old. i crave for the meaningful, the magical, the natural world. there is societal, consumerist stuff all around me...and sometimes i just want to see trees. some days, i buy chocolate doughnuts, when all i really want is something grown from the earth.
today i'm feeling that pull. that need for only the basics. that drive for simple and profound.
i am having a love affair with Henry David Thoreau these days. his words drifting into my soul and settling down for a stay.
there is so little that we need.
there is so much that we have.
and i look at these two light filled beauties in my care and i see how much they learn and see from this pattern all around us and i wonder how to escape it...and this is when i think of how much more WORLD is out there and how differently we all experience the earth's resources...and i want to really get it. i want to really know it and change it and love the complexity while fighting for simplicity.
now i am just blubbering along.
i really just came on here to talk about how much love i felt for my babies when i looked at these pictures.
and now i am thinking of how i hope they know what the trees whisper when the wind blows.

4 comments:

Debbie said...

There is no way your children will not know the power of the earth and all she possesses. There is no way your children will not grow up to appreciate all that surrounds them. You are a courageous woman and mother, sticking to her feelings and desires even when they are not the "mainstream" thoughts. You are you, and that is why we all love you. And yes...love is pouring out of those photos of your babes!

Jamie said...

They will....because YOU are their mother. :)There is no doubt in my mind about that.
Maybe you can have some one on one time with the magical spell of the ocean this weekend. I plan to.....

darlene said...

i think you should pack up and move here, tee hee ;-) you are such a beautiful momma and those beautiful children of yours are going to feel connected to the earth, how could they with you as their momma ... love you, xo

Andrea and Blake said...

I totally feel that way a lot, but feel helpless and sometimes think it's silly of me to actually think it could happen - it's hard escaping all the craziness!! I grew up on so much property with tons to explore and it felt like an adventure... you are darling